LvC Part 3: Shaping our futures
Managing passive feedback on mindset
Abstract
When things are changing, how do we ensure that we do not fall into complacency?
I ask this as it is a judgement call to decide whether our priorities stay the same or not, and whether new priorities are intentionally created.
My initial idea is on keeping a watchful eye on the various factions of our lives to ensure they go in the direction we wish.
But what about when things are out of our control?
How do we manage becoming lazy in some respects as a sacrifice for a seemingly bigger goal?
Remaining on the topic of school, this post presents a story of reflection on my mindset in secondary school to sixth form, where introspection on complacency’s effect on my mindset is at the core of it.
Discussion
How my mindset shifted in sixth form
The difference between being in secondary school and sixth form was the change in environment.
In secondary, that final boss of challenge never came.
The inherently more difficult work I was expecting?
Yeah, never came.
As a result, a couple of months before taking my final GCSE-style tests, I realised the biggest challenge would be to outdo all of my past efforts, which is what I ended up doing.
Even though I got the highest attainment in my school, I was still dissatisfied with some of the results I got.
The reason for this?
I knew my capabilities.
Not airy non-evidence-based beliefs, but because I had obtained a resoundingly higher result in mock papers in certain subjects prior to the final exams.
Perhaps the realisation of myself being my only competition came too late?
Who knows what the final results could have been if I saw this earlier.
From my results I moved onto a new sixth form with far better attainment at GCSEs.
Now looking through the lens of invisible competition, I can see how the change in mindset and environment of going to a new school propelled the threshold as to what I can manage alongside my standards.
To give context, I have never set goals to stick to in academia.
For me, it is a case of knowing that I am going in the right direction whilst acknowledging that there will be more barriers, but as I will have worked hard to get to that position in the first place, I will ensure that the hard work will not go to waste.
In sixth form, I was not the ‘smartest’ in the room.
It was then I realised what it meant by not wanting to be the smartest in the room.
In reflection, I think it caused me to develop faster and raise my own standard, as I had been exposed to another level.
If you told me this cliché of not being the smartest in the room when I was in secondary school, it would have completely gone over my head.
As I matured though, it made more sense to me.
Maturing came alongside new experiences and reflection which has added up to a bit of wisdom I hope.
When I think about the saying now, I recognise that not being the smartest provides an indirect external pressure, like a call-to-action.
It forces you to reflect on your position amongst others and ultimately raises your standard.
This is how I perceived the environment when I was going into sixth form.
Even though it wasn’t the case that everyone got the maximum points at GCSE level, and instead students would have had less attainment than me, it was a mindset shift I experienced as a result of my expectations.
This is indicative of the fact that the efforts and standards my parents and I placed on myself were independent of the school I go to.
My idea is that my new school supplied motivation, as I witnessed other’s achievements in the terms of how I define my own achievements.
Similar to the analysis on the impact my secondary school environment had on me, I decided to look further into this.
One thought that I had was given we had spent 6-7 hours in school, 5 days a week, would this have a subconscious effect on the standards we have placed on ourselves for the future ahead?
Perhaps due to my change in school, this had a more profound effect on me as I had my experience at another school to base it off?
It is similar to the argument that you can’t become what you can’t see, the reason role models are so important in many people’s lives.
We can get caught up by the standards of our environment whilst trying to uphold our own.
But by having something similar to a ‘North Star’ as to where we aspire to be, more clarity can be achieved on how our environment affects us.
I explore this further through parent’s evening, as I think this was an opportunity to gain insight into what I could do better via the feedback my teachers gave me.
Parent’s Evening
To build upon the point of role models, I will explore it in the medium of parent’s evening throughout secondary and sixth form.
I asked my mum what she recalls from these evenings of reckoning, as all I could remember was the fear and how (some) teachers praised or criticised depending on what mood they are in.
The questions I directed towards my mum were specifically in relation to the quality of the work I was doing and the areas of improvement.
Obviously, there were no areas of improvement - I just asked so I could confirm that this was a fact.
What can I say…
Ok, there were one or two points.
Or a few.
What was recalled were small details, where the teachers referenced refining the work to improve it - in other words editing and making sure the work was the best it can be.
For example in maths, small things like working out and presentation of work would have partly gone over my head.
Why though? Surely if I were already obtaining high marks, I would want to get the maximum?
This is where I think complacency came into play.
As mentioned before, despite there being areas of improvement from parent’s evening, my focus was on my maintaining standard and upholding reputation.
In the classroom, I knew with my efforts at the time that I would be amongst those who got the highest attainment and therefore I didn’t push myself further.
Perhaps I didn’t feel the urge to, and depending on the subject, I would consistently wait for the lesson to continue at the pace of majority of the class and leave it at that.
Looking back, I had the chance to ask for points of improvement or even delve deeper into those points already given to me, but I never did.
The extent at which I sought teacher’s assistance was when there was a problem or asking a question of understanding about what was taking place in the classroom.
But I was content with it being like this - being known as the ‘smart’ one and helping those next to me when possible.
On a deeper level though, I was consolidating the knowledge I have, which is great, don’t get me wrong, but not at the level I should have been.
I would always be happy to help the person beside me, but now I think subconsciously I relaxed.
At the time, my mindset was the competition being other people rather than just bettering myself.
It was only in the GCSE exam period that the main element of ‘invisible competition’ came to the forth, where I was my only competition.
Now when looking back on this I recognise the importance of not being the smartest in the room.
My secondary environment didn’t inspire me to push myself further, whereas my sixth form did.
In terms of our futures, Year 11 to the end of sixth form or college I believe can be formative years for double or triple the years ahead.
In general for me, these were fast years - years that ended in crucial exams.
For GCSEs it was what sixth form I’ll go to.
At the end of Year 12 the scope of what universities are feasible in the future gets narrowed down.
In Year 13 it was finalising UCAS applications, (for me) balancing degree apprenticeship applications, completing eight pieces of coursework, alongside mock and final exam preparations.
There seems to be little space for complacency, but the options available to me at each major milestone were as a result of the mindset I had before this period.
In hindsight, the aggregated moments of complacency across various facets of your life can only be truly felt years later.
Conclusion
Our environments are influential in developing our mindsets.
We have values, morals, and priorities which serve the basis of our mindset, but in my experience, it was my surroundings that provided feedback to those core pillars.
These surroundings have overarching influence over the mindsets we possess.
But to assume that we simply assimilate to what is around us is completely wrong.
The strength of these core pillars will determine how much impact our environment can have on us, where you may also see the basis of this in your life also.
Through parents evening as an example though, I feel as if the more concrete feedback you receive, the less space for complacency or drifting with what surrounds us.
This feedback can be achieved by asking someone else or having honest self-reflection, and I find it interesting how my own reflections on mindset have developed throughout writing this post.
In the last post of the LvC series, we will cover defining features in mine and my friend’s school experience, key figures who have shaped my outlook, and a final reflection to highlight key takeaways from the entire series.
Look forward to seeing you there!
P.S.
Finale next week 👀
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